Sunday again - finally a SUNday - beautiful almost spring weather, flowers in the yard are beautiful, the vegetables are growing, the days are longer. This week we studied 1john - walking in the light was so timely for me, not loving the world, 2:16 for everything in the world - the cravings of sinful man,the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does-comes not from the Father but from the world. So many conflicts in life come from this struggle - the cravings of sinful man...what we want, wanting what others have, wanting to tell others what we have.

So opposite of 3:18, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. I can't love if I'm wrapped up in what I want, or don't have or wish I had. I can only love when I'm content with my own circumstance. 4:11 since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

When I was ready to give up on Parker this week - when my heart was hardened by his behavior and love of the world, 4:21 popped up, whoever loves God must also love his brother.

Being a parent is hard, I'm so glad God gives me such a perfect example - he doesn't give up, he doesn't stop loving, he leaves the 99 to go after the one.

1john5:16 If anyone sees his brother commit a sin that does not lead to death, he should pray and God will give him life.

The weekend over, my first BSF leaders meeting in a couple of years - like old shoes so comfortable!! Doing homiletics last week - brought me to tears, I've missed that depth of study! God providing time without pressure or stress to get my lesson done early and my homiletics done. Church last night with such wonderful worship time...God is so good.

Doug's dad is dying and I'm so sad, so sad that he's been ill and distant for the past couple of years, so sad that I don't think he knows Jesus even though the gospel has been presented so many times. So sad that this phase of life is ending. I love Doug's dad, he was my dad the past 19 years, since my own father died. He was always so willing to do little projects for me (and some not so little ones) so willing to hang out with the boys. He loved his grandchildren. It makes me cry everytime I think about him being gone, even though he's been going for awhile, at Christmas he occasionally had that twinkle in his eye that was so him.

Therapist tomorrow with Parker - praying it goes well - praying he realizes how much I love him - even though he's always saying I don't!!! He's doing so well these days, I want so much the very best for him, but more than anything I want him to have a personal relationship with Jesus...I want him to choose that life, I want him to have fun with other believers. I know my own life took many turns, and in so many ways he's so much like me...I know it will be on his terms and his time. In the meantime I pray. I pray for a Godly wife, for friends who love the Lord, for a good relationship with his brothers, a career he enjoys...he so has my dad's sense of humor - I see it so often. Especially now that he's back to his old self. I pray for the anxiety to subside, for him to get that confidence back - the sadness and depression to go away...which in my mind is just letting Jesus in!!!

Weekend with my family - my mom, my sister and brother in law...what a special time it was! My mom is so very sweet, she is still sharp and has a twinkle in her eye! She loves shopping, flowers, good food, sweets, her family, and Jesus...over the years I've learned a lot from her. She was always so hospitable, my dad would bring people home for dinner with little warning, his family was over frequently, dropping by for the evening. Every Christmas she made tons of candy and allowed us to make boxes to give our friends. She was at church volunteering in the office or any where they needed help, my dad was usually leading, teaching, talking...mom was working or spending time with someone. They even let one of my friends - not even a close friend - live with us when I was a sophomore in high school. Helen was having trouble with her mom, she lived with us, my mom even made her skating costumes! They gave up the master bedroom for Helen. I really don't remember either of them complaining or questioning the decision to let her stay with us.

My sister and I used to joke (ok we still joke about everything) about which of us was acting like mom or starting to look like her. I think we both do now! Julie taught me to love by sharing her life with me, always welcoming me into her home and life - always. She has become my favorite prayer warrior, I love that we're both studying John in BSF now, I love talking to her about what God is teaching me/us, how we're growing and learning. I love that she would be here for me in a minute and I for her. I love that my sister is my best friend.